"Why Do I Feel This Way?"
An Interview with Jennifer Thomas

When someone comes to see you, how do you begin to sort out the possible mind/body connection in what they’re experiencing?

First, it’s important to note that as clinicians we are ethically bound to rule out any possible underlying medical causes for a client’s presenting symptoms. Concluding that it’s “all in your head,” is simply not an option!

Second, that determination begins with the very first visit. An Intake Evaluation and Symptom Checklist are completed. Once we have this paperwork, we can begin to ask questions and look for further clues.

Can you give us an example….

Depression, for instance, is a common state for which a person might seek counseling. Some of the physical signs of depression are fatigue, trouble concentrating, and slow physical movements known as psycho-motor retardation. Hypothyroidism, however, can also cause all three of these symptoms. The only way to eliminate a medical condition as the cause is to have the client see their physician for a blood test.

Another example would be a medication side-effect. Many of us don’t pay much attention to the long list of possible side-effects when we’re given a prescription. Something as common as birth control pills may cause emotional side-effects such as depression. That’s why it is always necessary to explore all the possibilities.

What other clues do you consider?

Timing is an important one. What life or relationship event may have occurred around the time the physical symptoms began? If there is a decrease in stress, do physical symptoms improve? Often a multi-pronged approach between a physician and a therapist is what may be most successful.

Much has been reported recently in the media on the correlation between relationships and physical health. Since we celebrate Valentine’s Day this month, do you have any suggestions for how couples might improve their relationships?

Good communication is obviously one main key to improving any relationship. I would remind couples to keep two important things in mind when they are trying to work through something:
1. Stay on the same team! Remember your spouse is not your enemy.
2. Maintain the assumption that the other person has good judgment!

Many people are familiar with the idea of reflective listening—saying back to someone what you believe they have said so they know they have been heard. From personal experience, however, I find this really takes a lot of time.

A simpler idea I have come up with is to switch roles. This means that you have to be able to present the other person’s viewpoint on the issue. Consider a car that is stuck in the mud. When we keep restating our own position, it’s as if the tires are spinning in the mud. If we have to dialogue about something using the other person’s point of view, it often helps things to get unstuck. If we aren’t able to do that, we may discover that we haven’t really been listening to the other person at all.

And how would physical health be impacted by improved communication?

According to a June report from the US Department of Health and Human Services, married people are generally healthier than unmarried people. Last fall a 12-year study reported that marriages and close friendships marked by conflict and adverse exchanges boosted the risk of heart disease.

Simply becoming aware of our own bodily tension, increased heart rate, and knotted stomach, it is easy to see how disharmony in important relationships impacts our physical being. In Proverbs 14:30, it says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body.” Learning ways to improve relationships or seeking counseling when we need help is good for our emotions and our health.

©2008 Associates in Christian Counseling, all rights reserved.

If you want help working through a difficult time in your life,
Call 336-896-0065, ext. 203, and make an appointment.