Associates in Christian Counseling

Think Back, Move Forward — An Interview with Jane Bailey

Is the glass half empty? Or half full? This common expression is used to indicate that something may be viewed from two different perspectives—one positive and one negative. When you thought about the beginning of this New Year, which perspective was yours? Jane Bailey provides us with a positive perspective.

Where would you suggest we start to “move forward”?
Most of us look at the year behind us through a negative filter. The question is generally “What did I fail at last year?” I believe we would do better with some cognitive restructuring. A more positive spin would be to cultivate awareness of what went right last year and to analyze what growth we had. In Philippians 3:13 we are encouraged to forget what is behind and move toward what is ahead…to press on toward the goal to which God has called us.

How do I think about myself in the process?
If you think about life as a journey, we need to ask if we want to keep driving along the same roads. Sometimes I hear the phrase “guilt trip.” Remember—we don’t have to purchase that ticket if we don’t want to take that trip! Good self-care will keep us on a more positive track as an individual. Good boundaries make for healthy relationships.

Why do you prefer to avoid the idea of resolutions?
Resolutions are often based in rigidity. I will loose X number of pounds; I will save X amount of money; I will spend X number of minutes in my quiet time, etc., etc. Resolutions often amount to a revolution against me. It becomes a spiritual battle because it is human nature to rebel against that kind of rigidity.

In conclusion, what are your suggestions?
Make your evaluations about growth from the heart rather than from the outside. As believers, we can seek to know what God wants for us in the year ahead.
Psalm 139: 23 & 24 say:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
If we seek His direction, we will find depth to our new beginnings.

If you are struggling with how to experience good self-care,
call 336-896-0065, ext. 203, for help.