Associates in Christian Counseling

Bullying

When you hear the word “bullying,” the image that flashes to mind is probably the big kid picking on the little kid…probably on the playground or the way to school…there’s probably shoving…probably loss—of a toy, money, or a lunchbox. This scenario does happen in real life as well as the movies, but bullying is often much less visible. It can be verbal, gestured, extortion, or exclusionary. In our wired age, there is now also e-bullying thanks to text messaging, Facebook, and YouTube.

National and international research has shown that bullying knows no boundaries of age, sex, or socioeconomic background. Studies have been done in this country, Norway, and Ireland to name a few. It takes many forms and may occur over short or long periods of time, even years.

A 1998 US study of more than 15,000 sixth through tenth graders reported that 30% of these students had a moderate or frequent involvement with bullying—either as the victim, the bully, or both. Middle schoolers, 6th through 8th graders, reported a greater frequency than the older students. Although bullying can take place right in the classroom, more than half of it takes place during breaks—the playground, hallways, or the bathrooms. (Bullying is Not a Fact of Life, www.mentalhealth.samhsa.gov) In “Beat Bullying” (Christian Parenting Today, January/February 2002), Karen J. Olson states that a study done in MI shows that bullying occurs every 7 minutes and averages 37 seconds in length. Although that may sound short to an adult, it might seem an eternity to a frightened child.

In the 8 years since Columbine, we have been shocked as a nation by school shootings. Often in the aftermath, it comes to light that the shooter has felt bullied, verbally or by exclusion, for a long time and has settled on a destructive way of dealing with it.

So what are the possible consequences of bullying for both the victim and the bully? Mona O’Moore, PhD, (Anti-Bullying Center, Trinity College, Dublin, Ireland) suggests that 85% of victims suffer long-term psychological damage and stress-related diseases later in life as a result. For others, the only solution they may see will be the rage of a school shooting, or suicide. Being the bully puts children at risk of criminal behavior or domestic violence as adults. Of identified people who bully, 60% will have a criminal conviction by the time they turn 24 according to Ms. Olson.

It is obvious that bullying can no longer be viewed or treated as a normal part of childhood. For more information on how to deal with this difficult issue as a parent, be sure to read the articles featuring Associates clinicians Dr. Heath Greene and Teresa Tindall, LPC.